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April 2002 Message from Ken: Higher Self?


  • Wisdom from My Teenage Daughters

  • Communication

  • Confused about the Higher Self?

  • WE International

  • Upcoming Events with Ken


Last week I went with my two youngest daughters doing their birthday shopping. One has just turned thirteen; the other is heading for sixteen. For those of you who do not have teenagers, I thought I would pass this wisdom on to you.

We were riding home in the car, and I said some smart-ass Dad type of comment. They told me that I wasn't being nice, and I said to them, "I apologize."

They said that the word "apologize" does not mean anything. When you apologize you are merely telling the other person what they want to hear, but you do not really regret what you said. You are just apologizing to appease the other person and make them happy. In their minds, my apology was almost an insult.

They explained to me that if I really meant it, I would have said "I am sorry for what I said." In their minds, "sorry" meant that I would not say it again and was truly sorry.



In my book, The Way It Works, there is a chapter on lying. A recent study of college students at the University of Virginia revealed that lying seems to be a way of life for many people. The results showed that the students told lies in seventy-seven percent of all conversations with strangers, forty-eight percent with acquaintances, and twenty-eight percent with their best friends. They lied to their lovers thirty-four percent of the time. Lies to Mom came in at forty-six percent.

A survey of one-thousand adults reported in The Day America Told the Truth, found that ninety-one percent of adults lie routinely and fifty-nine percent admitted lying regularly to their kids.

My point is — if my daughters are lying forty-six percent of the time to their mother, based on these surveys, then they must be lying at least fifty-nine percent of the time to me. The survey says that most adults lie fifty-nine percent of the time to our children. I think I've figured out why we have a communication problem with each other. As my sixteen-year-old daughter might say, "Duh, Dad."

I do believe we have a wonderful relationship and understand each other forty-one percent of the time. Pretty good for my generation. I apologize. I'll do better tomorrow. OOPS! I mean I'm sorry.

For the last few years I've done the best I can to be totally honest. This really changed my life, because I best not put myself in a situation where I cannot be truthful. Being honest is the only path we can take today. Anything else covers up my feeling or emotion so the other person will not know that I am lying.

Lying confuses us and distorts our perceptions of reality. Lying causes us to distrust our own feelings, creating separation and miscommunication with our Higher Selves. One of the requirements of mastering unconditional love for ourselves and all creation is to be honest with ourselves and others.



I believe the concept of the Higher Self is a very confusing subject for the spiritual community.

  • What is the Higher Self?
  • Is the Higher Self a part of you?
  • Is the Higher Self a bridge or a gate?
  • Does the Higher Self have anything to do with the subconscious mind?
  • What is the connection between the Higher Self and the physical body?
  • Is this a higher part of you that reflects Source?
  • Does Source use the Higher Self to communicate with us?
  • What does the Higher Self have to do with God or Source?
  • Is your Higher Self God or Source?
  • If you are communicating with the Higher Self does this mean you are communicating with God or Source?
  • If your Higher Self is God or Source, why would you ask angels, guides, archangels, or ascended masters like Jesus or Buddha to tell you what to do? If you were not connected to your Higher Self, then how would Jesus or Buddha know what you need or how to communicate with you?
  • Is your communication with your Higher Self affected by lying?
  • Does the Higher Self only allow you to communicate with angels and ascended masters?
  • Is your Higher Self as high as these ascended masters?
  • Is your Higher Self as knowledgeable as the masters and gurus?
  • Is information from your Higher Self higher or lower that the words of the Bible, the Koran, the Torah, the Vedas, the I Ching, the Sutras, or the Tarot?

When people say that angels told them what to do; or a great ascended master told them what to do; or an ET group told them what to do; or a pendulum told them what to do — should you be impressed that these people are getting information from somewhere outside themselves? Do you try to emulate these people and get your answers the same way?

So, is the Higher Self less than or more than other spiritual or religious beings outside of you?

You might be confused when you hear many well-known teachers telling you to look all over the universe for something that is inside of you already, telling you that Jesus or Buddha or Archangel Michael or the Pleiadians or some other reality will give you your answers or will save you.

Do you want to communicate directly with your Higher Self if the Higher Self is you, and you also realize that we are one and not separate. Then you would have to be responsible for your creations? Yuck!

Why is it that some teachers say "My angel told me." Does it give validity to their teachings so that no one will question them? If the teaching is not right, would they say that they didn't understand the communication with their angel? Then the teacher could say, "I received new information from my angel and this is what the information should have been." This keeps the teacher from having to be responsible for the consequences of what they are sharing.

Are you impressed when someone channels a guide or ascended master as an adviser, or is now getting advice and information from the devas? Are you impressed when someone says he called in thirty angels or masters to be here and help him? Does this sound more impressive than, "I received a quiet knowing from my Higher Self?"

If you told people you were going to channel your Higher Self would anyone care or listen?

Why do so many people have these connections to guides or angels in so many different ways?

We know that some people feel, hear, or see their knowing and guidance. Do people trust the feelings and information coming in from these senses? Do people trust their own answers?

I believe we trust other people's guidance more than our own. What happens when you give away your power to someone outside of you? What happens when you get your guidance outside of yourself? Have you given your power away?

Do you realize we are a minority? The USA represents approximately four percent of the world's population. How many of the four percent are metaphysical? And how many even would question what the Higher Self, guides, angels, or ascended masters really are? How many believe that they could be Source!?!

No wonder you might feel alone and might be looking for something outside of you that could save you. Our thoughts, feelings, and ideas of spiritual realities don't fit with 99.9 % of the people of the earth.

I believe that if any of you, on a spiritual path, challenged an idea or a teacher, that the teacher or group would ask you to leave. I would bet that if you honored your truth, you have been told to leave many times from groups that you were once aligned with. You may have been asked to leave your spiritual home or friends.

Just connecting to our Higher Selves is not the end of it, although I feel this is a very important step in discovering our purpose here on Earth. I believe that when you make that connection, it will change the vibrations of your Higher Self in your physical body — you are becoming something new. It means you are a mirror or reflection of Source, have new awareness and knowing — you have to walk your talk. The physical body is the last spiritual frontier for many of us. There is no reason to say anything, it's you living what you believe.

I believe that when you are connected to Higher Self, you are directly connected to God or Source. And that nothing outside this connection is higher or knows more than this connection. Oh no, I'm really a minority now, 0.0001% of the population. I wonder what I can trust outside of myself. Does this mean I am One with everything, having compassion for all life, a creator co-creating with others.

Discernment is very important. What I share with you are my opinions and I realize that they represent a very small fraction of the thinking in the spiritual community today.

So who do you think is the highest?

A. Your Psychic

B. Your Guide or Angel

C. An Archangel

D. The Ascended Masters

E. Sai Baba, Mother Mera, another Avatar, or your Guru

F. Your Higher Self

G. God, Goddess, or whatever you call Source

H. Jesus, Buddha, Krishna, Mohammed, or Moses

I. The Indigo Children

J. Your Extraterrestrial Group

K. Yourself

L. Other

I'd like to do a survey that will be sharee in an upcoming newsletter about your opinions about who is the highest on this list. If you wish to place a vote on the ABOVE categories, please reply as directed below. We can only count your vote if you send it in the following fashion.

HOW TO VOTE: Send an e-mail to ken. ON THE SUBJECT LINE, TYPE IN THE LETTER OF YOUR CHOICE: A L. Only votes noted on the subject line can be counted.



I recently did a workshop in St. Paul, Minnesota, with Bonny Kraus of WE International. They have a wonderful group. We had a large one day workshop and I was busy the whole time. I was later told that I was brought in to do a workshop to raise money for their group.

I was sharing this story the other day and said that I was better than a cake sale. I will now be putting this on my resume. If you take a workshop from me, you can have your cake and eat it, too. Spirit has a wonderful way of playing with us.

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