RELEASING RAGE
A friend of mine who studied with a Buddhist priest came to visit me and we talked about all the changes taking place on Earth at this time. Right before he left, he gave me some information that was to change my life. He said there is a Buddhist belief that this is the last lifetime the priests are going to be here on Earth. He asked me, "Since this is to be their final life, do you know what is the last thing they have to release?" Pausing, since I had no answer, he said, "We have to release our rage."
His answer shocked me. I could not understand why a group of priests would feel they had any rage they needed to release. He said the key to what he had been taught was to let go of everything and go completely into rage. He explained when one goes into true rage, they lose total control. By being able to really be with our rage, it sets us free. Buddhism teaches we need to let go of every thought we are holding onto, because every such thought ties us to this reality. To fully transcend this dimension, we no longer could control anything.
Within a few minutes of his initial question about rage, my friend left. Even though we only spent three or four minutes discussing it, I really got to thinking about what he had said. Most of us are taught in the Western world not to express our anger, let alone our rage. As a healing facilitator, I see six or seven people a day who tell me their life's story, which of course is my life story. As a result I get to look at my issues over and over again. After working with thousands of people, I know how much I work I have done on myself to keep myself clear and balanced.
Because I felt it was so important, the very next morning I decided to use my process of lucid dreaming to examine any rage I was still holding on to. To make it a real test for myself, I decided to start with the person with whom I had the biggest energetic charge or unresolved issues.
Now, if most of us were to be truly honest, we still have issues with our mother and father. Chances are whatever we experienced in our childhood was not close to our full potential of being loved. It was not until we were in our mid-thirties or even mid forties when we realized our parents loved us to the degree they loved themselves. Many of us still have issues with men or women and all of us have issues with anyone who should have helped us or protected us, but didn't.
In addition, the times we have chosen to live in are very energetic. Any unresolved issues we may still have are showing up, almost daily, hopefully to be balanced and released. Because time is presently collapsing, the polarities we have been using to learn our issues are also moving towards each other, causing any of these unlearned lessons to intensify, becoming more energetic or solid in feeling. As I got ready to address any rage I might be holding onto, I realized the issues I have with my mother and father and others had become solid.
So what were the issues I had with them? They were really simple. My parents were not the way I wanted them to be as I was growing up. As a child I wanted them to be kinder, happier, more loving and gentler towards me. Now, as an adult, I realized that really, there was nothing wrong with her. She was perfect. She was always the way she was. I was the one still holding on to the all the ways I wanted my mother to be. I still had a lot of unfulfilled expectations and judgements about her behavior. However, whatever issues I had with her were really my problem and I would not be able to heal them until I let go of myself. I knew that if I had rage about things that happened to me, I could not blame another person.
Then it was time. I was ready. Being as focused, balanced and present as I knew how to be, I allowed myself to go into the angry and frustrated feelings I was holding about my mother. I completely immersed myself in the energy. Almost immediately it felt as if I was being pulled into a vast floating pool of emotion-a space without an end, a place with no boundaries. I didn't know where I was. I was lost in my own emotions. I was scared, because I didn't know how to get out.
As I completely surrendered to the energy I was feeling, I emerged from it. When I checked in to see how I was feeling, I realized I felt nothing towards my mother. Since I had been the one holding onto all the feelings of the past, as soon as I let go, there was nothing left. The only thing I felt was I was clear and a little giddy.
As I thought about my mother, it did not seem to matter if she was my mother or not. In that moment I experienced a profound sense of newly found freedom. The only thing I knew for sure about my mother was that she was not the person I thought she could have been. My unfilled needs and judgements had defined my mother in the past, so, as soon as I let go of my definitions and feelings, there was no one there. I was free of my rage and free of my past. By my willingness to completely let go, I began to experience a new reality.
Enjoying how free and different I felt, I decided to examine any one else I was holding on to in the same way. Even after all the work I have done with myself, I was surprised to find there were still twenty people with whom I had rage, plus institutions, such as the IRS and the Church. I went through the rage release process with each of them, including the institutions. After doing so, my mind became quiet and I was overcome with feelings of compassion, allowance and peace, unlike anything I had ever experienced.
Practicing the Release of Rage
Lucid dreaming is a powerful creative state which can be used for understanding and creating our lives. When you practice Lucid Dreaming, you are working in the next dimension, the dimension of instantaneous creation. The more you consciously use the dreaming process, the more you become conscious of your creation, increasing your skill of instantaneous creation. All of us are moving to that magical space, but it can scare us because we are not sure what these powerful skills will bring. Just think, if the next thought you had changed your entire world, few of us would be prepared to be that responsible for our continuous thoughts. Most of us might be good for a couple of minutes, but not for an hour or two. Lucid dreaming is perfect to practice our ability of instantaneous creation.
Releasing rage can also be accomplished in a similar manner. Begin by thinking of a person with whom you have a lot of unresolved rage or anger. Focus on your feelings towards that person, go into them very intensely. Do not physically act them out. That is, do not yell or pound your pillow. Even though you are not outwardly expressing anything, this is a very powerful internal process. Continue being with your feelings until your rage and anger have dissolved and all is quiet.
Do not censor your experience; go into the anger, depression, sadness. To benefit the most from this process, do not hold back on your emotions, otherwise you will not enter the feeling of true rage. If you feel anger as you begin to do this release, go into the anger, don't retreat. You will be going into a void, which reflects whatever you are feeling back to you..
The mirror of the void reflects your feelings back to you. As soon as you match them, really feel them; you will move into them. You may feel you are losing control and just for a moment it might feel a little scary. Remember, what you are feeling is you. You are the one trapped in twenty or thirty years of inappropriate thoughts, locked into its vibration. This is what the Buddhists meant when they say it is important to lose control of every single thought we have ever had. This is how we can completely let go.
As soon as you completely 'step into your own stuff', you will feel out of control. This will be similar to those times in your life when you physically went into a rage. For those of you who have done this, remember how out-of-control you were. It was only when you came out of it that you realized you had brokne some object(s) or said many wild things. Don't worry that this will happen to you. It is safe using the lucid dreaming process, for you are only out of control in a dream.
You may repeat the exercise more than once. The first time you experience this, it will be the most intense. Give yourself time to process after the first exercise and wait perhaps a month. If you still feel a residue of old feelings, repeat this process until finally, you feel nothing. Your inner voice will tell you when to do it again.
My dynamics with the twenty people I worked with during my rage release changed, but more importantly, my whole life changed. Of the original twenty, only a few of the people were still present in my life. However, the feelings I had for them continued to be reflected onto new people who came into my life. Because my feelings of the past had remained unresolved, Spirit kept drawing similar people and situations into my life. Each time I recreated the energetics, I gave myself another opportunity to understand what I had been creating.
I have personally used the rage release process three separate times. Each time, I repeated the process with all twenty people. The first time I did it, I came out with nothing, with no feeling at all. However, my rage was gone. The second time I did it, I came out with feelings of love and compassion. The third time I did it, I came out with feelings of pure love. And, as those feeling of pure love existed within me, they also changed the world that exists outside of me.
