Own Personal Date with Destiny
by Michael Monahan, Heart & Soul Healing client
I never knew what hit me. One minute I was at the peak of my life, successful, happy and healthy, and the next moment my life, as I knew it, was over. What was about to happen in that life changing moment would change every area of my life, leaving no thought, belief, or even cell of my being untouched. It started out just like any other day in the late summer of 1992 in upper state Connecticut. When I casually yelled good-bye to my children that day and rushed by my wife on my way to the car, little did I know it would be more than two years before I could gather them up into my arms again and hug them. All I had on my mind that morning was the fact that I was late for work, and I had lots of work piled up, waiting for me once I got there. I had worked for the state for about fifteen years and lateness was frowned on, especially at bonus and promotion time.
I was quite a serious jogger then, using whatever spare time I could fit into my schedule to keep myself fit and healthy. Because of the long hours I worked and the distance I had to travel every day to and from work, I had recently taken up the practice of jogging during my lunch hour. It had developed into a regular routine of mine, and for the past month or so, a few of my coworkers had even begun to do my regular run with me. On that particular day, I almost decided not to go. This was very unusual for me, but l had not been feeling very well that morning and the weather had been unusually hot. The lunch hour came and the guys started to get their clothes and shoes on for the run. At the very last minute, just as my jogging buddies set out, prodded by their remarks about "slacking off," I decided to join them. Almost immediately I regretted it. I felt sluggish and slow. I could not get my running tempo right and I began to fall back in the pack. Never before had I run last in my group of five or six, as I prided myself on finishing first, every time we ran. Too quickly, I began to struggle just to keep up, and not embarrass myself.
Soon I found myself running at the very back of the group. Thankfully, torn between a real desire to stop and my stubbornness to finish, I realized the group had reached the very last intersection we would have to pass before returning to work. The city was in the process of doing road repair work at that particular intersection and so there were a lot of barriers and lights in place. My friends and I were running along the grass, beside the intersection, intent on keeping our pace steady and still out of the direct way of traffic. That is when it happened.
From out of nowhere, a large, dark blue, older sedan careened up on the grass behind us, and without warning, hit me squarely from the back. I had no time to think, no time to prepare myself. In mid air, reaching out to take my next step, I was hit and then pinned under the front of the car. My body, too big to pass all the way clear of the car's underside, was wedged about a third of the way back. Already beginning to black out from the shock and the pain, I remember thinking, "How did this happen? This can't be happening to me. This isn't real."
The entire details of the accident soon unfolded. An older man, unaware of our jogging group, had started to drive through the intersection. He was suffering from Alzheimer's and was somewhere in his seventies. That particular day he was in a very confused state, and he really should have been stopped from driving. His family had settled up his finances and had given him a limited amount of money, but they had not grounded him as such, nor had they taken away the keys to his car.
Apparently from eye witness accounts I heard later, the old man, while driving through the intersection, became distracted and confused by the construction. He lost control of his car and ended up driving up onto the grassy area, where my group just happened to be jogging by. The old man never even saw me. He actually unknowingly ran over me and l had become entangled and trapped beneath his car. While continuing to be oblivious to what was happening, the man continued to drag me along. Trapped underneath the car and unable to get free, I had passed out and had been unable to call for help.
My group, ahead of me, never even saw a thing. By a sheer stroke of luck, two city workmen on the construction job saw what was happening and tried to flag down the old man. They had run over to the old man's car and had began beating on his window, in an attempt to get him to stop his car. Once the man was stopped, the workmen helped to free me.
While it was a miracle that I was even alive, it would be two long years until I could truthfully say I was glad I had not died that day, for it was soon discovered that the accident had broken my neck. As a result, I have been paralyzed ever since.
You might think that the accident was my date with destiny. It was not. My real date with destiny, and the events that turned my life around began the day I met Ken Page.
Before my accident I would never have gone to meet this man. My straight forward reality would not have allowed it. Now, things were different. More than two long years had gone by since my accident, and I secretly wanted nothing more than to die. Strangely enough, because I was in a state of complete surrender and allowance, I was led to the very place and space where I would be able to begin living again. My wife had heard of some remarkable healing work that Ken had done and she told me about him, in hopes that I would agree to meet with him.
Prior to my accident, I had been very independent, with a lot of stamina and physical strength. I had prided myself on taking care of everything and everyone, both at my job and at home. I had been good at dealing with facts and logic and with being in charge. Now my wife had to take care of me completely. In the morning, she had to lift me out of bed and into the bathroom. She had to assist me in relieving myself and in giving me bed baths and showers. I was totally, absolutely dependent upon her and I just couldn't deal with it any more.
For all intents and purposes, I was totally immobile and I thought my inability to move around independently meant it was the end of everything that was meaningful in my life. I had been able to continue working at my job with the state, which gave me something to look forward to each day. However, I was both grateful and ashamed that the state had modified my job, eliminating the traveling I had done before my accident. Each work day I would get up, with considerable effort and the assistance of my wife, and get into my wheelchair. My wife would then take me out to the front curb where a special state van would collect me, taking me to and from my job. Sad about these changes I had pretty much given up all hope my life could ever be any different.
I was surprised when I showed up for my appointment with Ken. I don't know what I was expecting from a 'healer' or a 'metaphysical kind of person', but Ken was very different from anyone I had ever met before. He was a soft spoken man, moving in a graceful, fluid and assured way. Quiet and unassuming, his powerful vitality and presence radiated out of his brilliant blue eyes. This was a man who both loved and believed in what he was doing. He had a remarkable way of making me feel completely comfortable, and I found it easy to tell him even my most private thoughts and fears about what had happened to me. Almost immediately, even when Ken did the initial energetic scanning of my body, there were some unusual occurrences. I was able to feel the powerful radiant energy of his hands around my head. I was also able to feel his energy when he put his right hand below the base of my spine, and his left hand on top of my head. My body was reawakening to feelings and sensations I had not had in two years!
I had brought my X-rays for Ken to see. I had not severed my spine or my spinal column in the accident, but I had been unable to move nevertheless. I had just recently started to get back some faint feelings in my arms and hands and some very faint physical sensations and feelings along my spine. As Ken put his hands in a drawing position along my spine, I could really feel the energy moving down my spine as it actually started to get hot. I had never felt anything as strong in that area.
Although Ken's process of Heart & Soul Healing was very different than anything I had heard of, I found the things he explained to me made a lot of sense. The process apparently took over ten years to develop and allows the client to understand what was happening in their life, mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. Ken said once we understand something on all four of those levels, we would no longer continue to create those situations in our life. More than anything else, I wanted to see and clearly understand why this had to happen to me.
The first thing that was recognized and released in my session was the anger that had come as a result of my accident and had continued to build inside of me ever since. Ken then took me back to the scene of the accident, just prior to the time when I was struck by the car. We found out that psychically I knew something was going to happen to me that day. In fact I found out I had actually known the day before that something was about to happen and this was the reason I had not been feeling well the day of the actual accident. Apparently, when something of this nature is about to happen to us, we always know it. The trouble is we don't always recognize or trust these communications from our inner self.
During the session with Ken, in the space he created for me to connect with my higher self, I became aware of a number of things I had forgotten since the accident. While at the hospital, after I was injured, it was revealed the angels had come to talk to me. I had never been able to tell anyone about this, as up until the session I was pretty sure I had been just hallucinating or was confused. In fact, the angels had come to me in the hospital to tell me I had a choice whether to stay or to leave. I also remembered at one point I was very conscious of floating over my body while the doctors operated on me! I also was conscious of floating over my body, observing everything, while I was in a coma for a few days, hearing and observing everything happening around me.
Part of the main focus of my session became what the angels had said to me and what the actual, specific reasons were that played a factor in my decision to stay and live my life through, even though I knew I would be paralyzed. It made all the difference in the world to realize I had apparently even chosen to experience the accident, and the remaining disabilities, as a lesson about power and control. I now could understand why, for I was also learning about forgiveness, trust, love, and compassion. At that time in my life, because of the path I had chosen, I had to change and the accident was the most efficient way to make all of those changes at once. The accident caused everything in my life to change and it not only brought me and my family closer together, it allowed me to know who I really was, and what my purpose for being here on Earth was to be. However, in order to get that information, I had to be in touch with my true, inner self.
Through Ken's work, I was able to gain an overview and understand insights that I had not been able to before. I now understood I had chosen to stay and this alone made an incredible difference to me. I had, prior to this, thought consciously many times that I wished I would have died in the accident rather than live such a limited and dependent life. The understanding I was able to receive provided me with the needed spark of hope which had been missing before. My attitude changed from one of "I don't want to be here, I am useless" to "I can do this now and I still have something important to give." One of the things I was able to understand and receive from my session was that my soul had chosen to be an example to others, to teach others about persistence, bravery and courage. The problem had been I did not admire or love myself. Even prior to the accident, I had secretly felt I couldn't really do anything here of importance, and that with the accident, I wouldn't have to try anymore. I now understood it was my own feelings about myself that mattered.
Following my experience with Ken and the progress I have made since then, on all realms of my being, (mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually), I realize how important and vital our connection to our own inner or higher self is, and how Ken was able to create that space for me, so I could connect to my own inner knowings. I know that space, along with the Heart & Soul Healing work, has helped thousands of other people, from all walks of life, get in touch with their own purpose and reason for being.
We all have dates with destiny, but the most important one we can ever have is the one where we are provided the opportunity to tap into our own sense of self and our own beingness. My life has been forever changed. I now want to live life to the fullest. I rejoice every day that I am here, for each moment, to do the very best I can possibly do, just within that one precious moment. Please take it from someone who has been there. Be all that you can be, in every moment of your life, for it may just possibly be all that you truly have.